I was recently in America.

I love America. It is majestic. But in Vegas, the lights doth protest too much, and you don’t have to look too hard to see beneath them lie a large, sinister, darkness.

On a joyous note, lots of people speak Spanish. Holy moly. I wish I spoke Spanish. It was like Chinese in Toronto, except it was Spanish… in Vegas.

And there were SO MANY FAMILIES on vacation. So many. A few folks with kids on their backs (babies) in the national parks, but for the most part, if you brought your kids, they were … rougly 8 and up, mostly 12+, I’d guess.

Germans and Frenchies are EVERYWHERE. Je ne parle le francais. GUTENTAG. Shut the f up, it’s midnight, and these are tents, you morons, I can hear you talking through my EAR PLUGS.

The gun range was exhilarating. Exhilarating in the sense that I had headphones on to block out the reverberating sounds of guns in a CEMENT BLOCK WALLED SHOOTING RANGE (so loud!), and if I didn’t know the bullet was going to be shot, I jumped. Every time. Because it’s a friggen GUN going off.

Will shot a Desert Eagle and hit the target. I’m proud of him. So glad I didn’t shoot, though. I thought about it, but after seeing it done, I would’ve broken my arm, and dislocated my shoulder, and scarred myself for life (mentally, if not physically).

One last thing: I want to one day do the National Parks circuit again with kids, like many of the families did we saw. They just looked like they were having fun, and it was relaxing.

But that’s not TOO out of the question. Get a couple weeks vacation, or something, and you can do that.

But there’s something else I admire tremendously that is … questionable. Because for us Northerners, it’s  counter-cultural. And it scares me a little bit that I’m afraid of it, that it might be wrong for me to do it (not everyone SHOULD do it), and that I would be the only one I know doing it.

See, I’m not saying I want to homeschool, but the families I really admire, do. And that scares me. What does it mean for me? I want to investigate it. But before you can even homeschool, you have to decide not to work. And as you decide how to shape your family, what are you going to do? Get pregnant? Adopt? When? How many? Three kids? Or 4? Or 5 or 6 or a billion?

See, everyone I know – maybe it’s Canadian or big-city culture, not sure – sends their kids to school, and the wife goes back to work, and they only ever have 2 kids. And they’re their own kids. Unless they’re infertile then they adopt. But I want vacations with my husband and kids; adventures and cottaging and roadtrips as a family. I want the time to do this. The space to do this.  Because of what they mean for a family, to spend that time together, creating those memories, having fun together and remembering what’s important.

I know you can work from home, or start your own business, or work part-time. Those all seem like safe options that give you both an income and the benefits of being at home with kids, sort of. But it just seems so different. So unknown. So foreign. To do anything other than working the 9 to 5, having a small, manageable family, and going on short 2 week vacations using the parent’s vacation days.

Arg. I hate feeling so unprepared.


One Comment Add yours

  1. beth maher says:

    I would kinda like to homeschool my kids too, for the same reasons. If we both did it together, we could have play dates and stuff, and it wouldn’t be so bad!

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